Hey there, beautiful souls! The big 3-0 has rolled around, and I'm buzzing with excitement about the future. You know, hitting those milestone birthdays uniquely makes us stop and reflect on life's journey. But it's also a chance to soak in the wisdom of the phenomenal women who've been by our side.
I've been blessed to have some amazing women in my corner—strong mothers, fabulous aunties, and incredible friends. Their advice and stories have molded my outlook on life.
So, what's the plan? I'm here to spill the tea! In this blog series, I'm dishing out the incredible advice, insights, and love I've soaked up from these remarkable women. We're diving headfirst into what it takes to thrive in your 30s.
Whether you're already in your 30s or the big 3-0 is on the horizon, get ready to join me on this journey of self-discovery, growth, and empowerment. Let's explore the wisdom of these phenomenal women, and together, we'll light up the path to living our absolute best lives in our 30s. It's going to be one heck of a ride! 🌟
From Mom:
Alexis, I want you to know as you move into your 30s that aging from 29 to 30 does not change who you are. The person you were at 29 will be the same person you woke up at 30. The changes we make in our lives are always under our control. A number does not give us an advantage, nor does it give us a disadvantage. The next piece of advice I will give stems from the above. God has allowed you to make choices in your life. The choices that you make determine the path your life will take. You can be your best supporter or worst enemy... the option is yours to make.
My final advice is to advise you not to be afraid to try new opportunities. We sometimes limit our life adventures to a space where we are 100% sure we will succeed. We don't give ourselves the opportunity to step outside of that space to move beyond our self-inflicted limits.
Now, my sweet daughter, you know that you can't step out alone and be truly successful. You know that you must keep God first, and the rest of your life goals will follow.
"I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me." Philippians 4:13: I shared this verse with you when you were a child, and I have witnessed your faith over the years, so I know you know this verse is true. Matthew 17:14-21 lets us know that if we have faith the size of a mustard seed, we can move mountains. The verses also tell you that this can only be done through prayer and dedication to God.
From Grandma:
Hey Gbaby Lexie,
I feel honored and beyond happy that you want my advice as you begin the next chapter of your story.
Love on those who love on you. Celebrate those who celebrate you. Stop crossing oceans for people who wouldn't cross a puddle for you. (You get the picture)?
Never water yourself down for people who can't handle you at 💯 proof. Utilize this proof when necessary, but be willing to be softer and vulnerable when the right person who is worth it comes along.
Finally, here's the biggie: Start saving money right now, today, for your retirement savings! You will thank me later!
From Aunt Tasha:
Dear sweet niece, here is some advice for enjoying life in your 30s:
If you don't already, set aside the first fifteen to thirty minutes each morning to spend with God. Download the Youverse Bible App and read devotion passages related to whatever you're going through in life. Always end the devotion with a prayer of Thanksgiving, asking God to order your steps, and pray throughout the day!
Date yourself - Just like spending time with your significant other is important, it's also important to enjoy your company and celebrate the woman you've become!
Know your credit score; if it's not where you need it to be, take the steps NOW to fix it before it spirals out of control.
From Aunt Kris:
Do NOT be too quick to beat yourself up. Sure, you're now 30 years old, and you may not have accomplished everything you envisioned for yourself in your 20s. It's really okay. Take your time, and don't put unnecessary pressure on yourself. Move at your own pace. Set small, attainable goals, and keep your focus. You're going to be okay.
You're 30, but you can STILL have big fun. Just know when to pull back so you don't lose focus on the bigger picture. Moderation is crucial.
Utilize your 30s to get and maintain a healthy lifestyle. Your knee joints are still healthy, so take advantage of this and walk, walk, walk!! Listen to your body. Try to make small changes now for big benefits later. Your body will thank you in the long run!
From Steffie:
Be prepared to fail, but don't give up. Continue to strive for your goals with consistency and confidence. It only takes one "yes" to turn your opportunity around. Find the yes.
Have an emergency fund, a minimum of $5,000 to a maximum of $10,000 or more. This way, you are prepared for anything you didn't prepare for.
Enjoy life! Make sure to take your time off, holidays, etc. Don't work too hard. If you're sick, take your sick days. You work 365 days to enjoy one week off. Enjoy life and do the things you love that put you in a peaceful state. This is what you come to love!
From Lawanda:
Start self-care early.
Find a career that fulfills you, not just filling a job.
Embrace every opportunity, positive or negative, as a learning experience to help you grow.
From Julie:
Find a good church home and work on your salvation.
Delete your social media for one week quarterly. It helps you keep reality in perspective.
Stop rushing. You are the only person who's lived your life. What race are you running, and against whom?
From Denise:
The first three things that come to mind are:
Enjoy the journey. ✨ We spend so much time fantasizing about how great it will be to achieve a specific goal. Once you attain that goal, you'll probably create another, and it begins again. True happiness is found within the journey, not at the destination.
Love and embrace your true self. ✨ We spend way too much time wondering how others view us. It can stifle us. Be yourself. It's okay if you aren't everyone's cup of tea; you are many people's Diet Dr. Pepper (😂 my fav drink).
Listen to the dreams of your heart and use them as a compass. ✨ I've learned that the yearning in our hearts motivates and inspires us. Regardless of the circumstances, stay true to what you know in your heart. Follow that.
One extra because it came to me while writing this - Focus on what truly matters!! ✨ There are some things that are nice to have and some things you need to have. Learn the difference and focus on the essentials (e.g., self-care, work-life balance).
From Candace:
To thine own self be true. Others will judge you no matter what.
No matter your relationship with your mom, everything she did molded you into what you are today. Be grateful for that.
Do something you're passionate about - not all money is good money - do what makes you proud, not just what pays your bills.
From Mrs.Karen:
Focus on your personal and professional growth; have a spiritual place to refresh and recover.
Date or marry the person who complements you and is secure in supporting you in all that you will achieve.
Live fully, travel, experience other cultures, eat great food, and celebrate with family and friends.
From Raegan:
Be relentless in your goals. You are guaranteed to get derailed by things outside your control, but take an alternate route and keep pushing/clawing/inching forward.
Surround yourself with good energy - from your space to the people you choose to be around to how you spend your time. Make sure it's actually making you happy.
Take care of yourself. It's tempting to always try to push through, but it takes a lot more time to come back from burnout or recover from an illness than it takes to prioritize your well-being.
From Courtney:
Don't beat yourself up so much about work or being unable to accomplish work or personal goals as fast as you want. You can only do so much in one day. You're still young. You're single with no kids, and honestly, that's a blessing... I love being married and being a mom, but it's also nice to figure yourself out before you start a family, be happy in your career, and find your niche within the work setting.
Love yourself. We are often so hard on ourselves. We truly are our own worst critics. That's normal. But give yourself some grace. You're doing great!
Research Dave Ramsey and consider his program. Make every dollar that you earn accounted for. You honestly have more money than you think you do. Often times we spend our money on dumb stuff, but all those dollars add up. Most millionaires have very basic jobs. We don't follow Dave to a T.
Remember, everybody isn't happy for you. Keep some things to yourself.
Don't feel bad for cutting people off. You gotta do what you gotta do.
I could go on and on, honestly. But focus on yourself. You're more important than anybody else. Do what makes you happy. Take risks if you feel it's necessary. Somebody is always going to judge you, but so what? Remember to be thankful for what you have. People appear to have more than they do. But as long as you have a steady income, can pay your bills, and eat, you are doing excellent!
From Joy:
Your 30s can be the best! If I were turning 30 today, I would say yes to as many adventures as possible. Make those memories last a lifetime.
I would connect with a financial planner and make sure my actions align with my long-term goals.
And I would get aggressive about my skincare and wellness routine. More sleep! More water! More movement! Retinol, baby. Sunblock every day.
The best part of my thirties was being confident enough to say no. Boundaries were a game-changer.
From Angela:
Professional:
Your word and integrity are the most valuable things you own. As anyone grows and succeeds, there will be "haters." If your reputation is one of integrity, their attempts to pull you down will fail over and over again.
Over-deliver and under-promise. It's easy to want to do things big and do them well. Know your capacity, and don't make promises you can't keep. You don't want to be known as flaky or unreliable.
You are exactly where you are meant to be. The universe knows your dreams and is working on getting you there through the path of least resistance. To lament about not being further or being where you didn't expect is just throwing detours on your path. The magic truly is in the journey.
Personal:
Believe people the first time they show you who they are and adjust boundaries accordingly immediately. It's always easier to loosen than it is to tighten. One of my favorite things about myself is my ability to detach from someone or something that isn't healthy for me despite the excuses or reasons. Fool me once; shame on you. Fool me twice; shame on me.
Get a coach or a therapist. Everyone needs one, even if sporadically. Your friends and loved ones are naturally biased and will let you make excuses. Find someone who can help you find who you truly are, process, and grow.
Know who you are, and never let anyone (yourself included) forget it.
From Christian:
Identify and celebrate all wins. It's not bragging.
Practice vulnerability. It draws people in.
Use. Your. PTO. You can't pour from an empty cup.
Speak kindly to yourself.
From Aunt Vicki:
Always place God the Creator and His Son Jesus above everything and everyone.
Never make a decision when you are emotional. You should take some time to calm down and then pray about it.
Set realistic goals and start paying off your highest bills. This will set you up for financial freedom in the years to come. Trust me, it is a beautiful feeling.
Closing
As I take a moment to soak in the incredible wisdom shared by these phenomenal women, I'm just overflowing with gratitude for the amazing role models who've been a guiding light in my life. You know, stepping into your 30s can be a real adventure, sometimes even a little intimidating. But with the wisdom, advice, and insights I've soaked up from these incredible women, I'm absolutely sure I'm gonna rock this journey with all the confidence, grace, and wisdom in the world. And hey, I hope their words sprinkle some inspiration on your path, just like they've done for me as I navigate this fabulous journey called life. 🌟💁🏾♀️💫
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